How Do You Prioritize DEI: A Lesson in Love Languages

Ahhh! February! The smell of love is in the air. Heart-shaped chocolates, oversized stuffed animals, and flower bouquets fill the shelves of Target. Valentine’s Day is upon us as you prepare to celebrate the people in your life by showering them with the things they love most. You know, like gifts, extra sappy cards, or a night out on the town. 

Those acts of kindness are amongst the widely known 5 Love Languages. A love language is a way a person receives and expresses love. The five love languages are: words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service, and gifts. Although you may be familiar with or have practiced them in your personal life, did you know the 5 Love Languages can effectively develop a company’s diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) strategy? Please take a seat, and let me tell you how.  

Words of Affirmation. Words of affirmation are verbally expressing your appreciation, empathizing with others, encouraging, and affirming that they matter. It is the simplest way to show others you care but often the most challenging love language to accomplish. 

Applying words of affirmation to your DEI strategy, it’s all about communicating your company’s commitment to incorporating DEI in every aspect of your business. Think strategically about how you can tell your story. A few examples include: 

• Developing a communications strategy that is well-rounded and considers all your internal and stakeholders. After all, you should be telling your story in a way that best relate to them. Side note: this does not give you an excuse to play into offensive stereotypes and unflattering narratives. Don’t be stupid!
• Create marketing campaigns and brand assets that are highly representative of all ages, cultures, ethnicities, religions, abilities, socioeconomic status, occupations, etc. Remember – if people see themselves in your marketing, they will more likely identify with your brand and become customers. 

Quality Time. Quality time is about focused, uninterrupted time — a relentless dedication to spending one-on-one time building upon the foundation of one’s relationship. 

In implementing quality time into your DEI strategy, your executive leadership team must give their undivided attention to the mission and goals of DEI. They must also pay close attention to the benchmarks and milestones of the goals and the challenges that could thwart them. Examples include: 

• Schedule regular mandatory meetings with your company’s leadership team and crucial front-line employees to discuss the progress of DEI goals. 
• Eliminate outside distractions that jeopardize the fulfillment of DEI goals and redirect negative comments that erode confidence in the company’s commitment 

Physical Touch. I know you must be thinking, “physical touch can’t possibly be incorporated into a DEI strategy. After all, it involves physically putting your hands on people (and that is a No-No!).” Well, you are wrong. 

When it comes to physical touch and your DEI strategy, I implore you to implement creative ways to “touch” or engage with your audience and the community you are servicing. More specifically: 

• Host community outreach events with the diverse communities your DEI efforts serve. Be sure to mix it up, though. Host events that invite them to provide feedback on your efforts and impact, as well as events that invite them to kick back and have a great time on your dime. 
• Build authentic, non-transactional relationships with grassroots organizations and community leaders within the diverse communities your DEI efforts support and impact. This will keep you plugged into the community, their needs, and their progress. 

Acts of Services. Acts of service are the love language that is easily recognized, as it involves going above and beyond to be helpful. It is the love language that may engage your team the most, as it relies on the practical actions of your company towards the diverse communities your DEI efforts support. In other words, when you implement acts of service into your company, think about: 

• Volunteer efforts in which your company can participate. Find various non-profit organizations, and your team can support by giving their time. But make sure those organizations align with your DEI goals and efforts. 
• Use your corporate voice to advocate for causes that support diverse communities. When corporate voices advocate for social causes, more gets done.   

Gifts. Gifts are a straightforward love language, letting others know how much you value them. It has less to do with the monetary value of the gift. Instead, it’s the symbolic value and careful deliberation that goes into giving a gift. 

In incorporating gifts into your company’s DEI strategy, think about the value of the gift you are considering giving and how it will improve the community you are serving. Make sure your efforts are genuine and go beyond absent-mindedly stroking a check. More specifically: 

• Give philanthropic and financial gifts that help create a lasting legacy for the community you are servicing. You should also give financial gifts that help eliminate the barriers diverse communities face when creating sustainable lives.
• Gift cool company swag to the communities your serve. Again, gifts let people know you care about them, and it doesn’t hurt if it has your company’s brand on it. 

To promote DEI within your organization and create a balanced life (family, kids, work), you need to learn how to lovingly, patiently bring everyone together and respect all of those things for ourselves and each other. Understanding their trauma, their gifts, their talents, and their faults. How can we understand and come together to put out a product into the world to make ppl feel loved and included? This is what the 5 love languages are all about. If your company strategically uses them to create and implement your DEI strategy, you will undoubtedly win over the hearts and minds of many.